They said as I started typing to share my story.So I ask me,what story should I share that is I have any?Quite an important question as I asked myself a rapid one with my eyes dimming into slumber last evening,”So what is your story?”
So here I type away as the same question comes flowing into perspective,”What is my story? And what is your story? What lies behind all the glamour and flair you wrap around your walk and glow?
A famous song done by Mary Mary used to rhyme as,”It’s the God in me,It’s the God in me!”Quite a catchy rhyme and hum this was,still is and will be in the coming many blessed years God will shine on me or even you.
Every glow and glamour must have a story I believe,every sad grouchy and drooping face has a tale behind it.I once read a writer rhetoric that the man who walked to his front desk held a face that told a tale of the blows life had dealt him over his span of life.Quite cryptic that was and that image stuck glued to my mind.
So I find myself here tapping away letters into my blog as I ask myself over and over,”What is my story?”
My story is broad,my story is not one plastered with hipe and pomp,no,not even with a little silver lining to the grey clouds marauding above my once gloomy head,no!
I have read of rags to riches tales,and yes I love them.How poor Jack suddenly is approached at the corner of the street with his head between his knees and arms stretched out begging for alms from so would be ever so caring change owners.This stranger leans down towards Jack’s crouched head and whispers a few words into his keen ears.He then unexpectedly jerks up and looks all beamed up and jolly asking,”Are you sure?You for real on this sir?”
Next thing we hear is Jack is on Tv holding a big dummy cheque written several millions upon.This for your information will only be known by a few individuals who ever knew Jack as he was used as a front image to a bigger Shinda mamilioni (Win millions) scam! Next is an unknown story of Jack who then disappears from the phase of the streets.Never to be heard from again.
This my friends is what I think Englishmen called luck?Am not sure if that word really holds meaning though I gave up on the same the first few times I tried my hand in lottos back in the 90’s.I never won any of those.I tried betting on world cup games in the next coming years and that my dear PePa reader was the last time I ever tried my “luck” in anything.
After that I resolved to hard work and forging forward trusting God to bring the best out of every little thing I did.I knew I had little or nothing but hope,faith and trust.I knew that no matter what the world threw at me I would overcome it for the one who held me was stronger than every force of the universe combined together against me.
I recall for example when I first joined High School in the early 2000’s.This was me seated in an auditorium of 50 students;multiply that by 5 and having been the best in a class of 28 in my lower school this would sure have cowered me out my wits.Sweaty palms and an urge to be the best I had to make all things work together for my good.This called for more than just many nights of book-worming and sleepless ones at that.Something had to give and here it was nothing but my pride.
Reminds me of an earlier post I had done about my early school years called ,”THE DEATH OF A HUNTER:sketches of an onlooker” find it here for more.
Anyway,laying down my pride meant I had to admit that I couldn’t manage this vast expanse of education and growth on my own.That I needed better,wiser and deeper help,that multi-choice answers or higher cramming capacity(I was never good at this either) would not go far enough in helping me make it.
I needed more,I needed grace;a grace that had been my portion ever from the beginning of time and only called for me to tap into it(Ask, and it shall be given you; seek, and ye shall find; knock, and it shall be opened unto you: …. Ask, and it shall be given you; seek, and ye shall find; knock, and it shall be opened unto you: …
So I realised I needed to seek God first and seek His righteousness,lean on Him and He would work on me as required,that He would in time produce the best that He wanted out of me.
So coming from what everyone calls a humble background I had to be humble indeed;but what is humility in essence?Is humility equated to lack and pride to having much?Eludes my mind as I tend to dispute this school of reason.True humility lies in a heart willing to love,learn and appreciate.Such is true humility.It is deep-set and not just an emitted facade.
Humility led me to understand that there would always be people who would deem me inferior(not that there clouded judgement mattered at all but only my perception of their thoughts did),there would always be people who looked better than me and even those who had more than what I did.
What humility din’t teach me however is that if I was born without then I was doomed to stay the same always.It taught me that lack was a way to trust God in His purpose and strength to provide if I heeded to His call,if I thought better of others and treated them with care.That if I went out and put in work trusting God wanted the best for me then He would sure bless the works of my hands.
So trusting that I would be blessed in my efforts I went out and did my best leaning on Him for understanding.Working my way through I came out not top of my class but counted among the best of the cream.Yes that little boy from the bush was blessed and elevated to a point of recognition.
Does the story end there?If I was to narrate the countless times I have failed before,lay down flat on my belly in tears and cried my eyes out there sockets it would bring back the melancholy,the hurt and pains…Still it is a worthy tale as it would take me through the valley of the shadow of death in literal sense.
See this instance for example in the recent past when this new landlord pushes us out of his newly acquired establishment with a month’s notice and on a little dillying and dallying comes with an ingenious idea of drilling massive holes on the celing during a rainy season!
Did I cry or give up?Yes I cried but give up I din’t,taking forcefully from another as I had undergone the same cruelty was and still is out of question.
So,you will ask,what is my secret?Where does my strength lie?What gives me the juice to rise up every morning,fold my sleeves and say,’This is the day that the Lord has made,I will rejoice and be glad in it?” Yes you got the answer right there,God is the reason for my season,whatever I am going through,He is right there with me and has taught me that each day ain’t mine rather He has made it and will provide sufficiently for me.That He has grace enough for every moment that comes and hits my way.
That it doesn’t matter my current state,how bad I feel it is or even how bad it all looks.That there is no luck in life but only His hand in everything I go through.
That I only need to lean on Him and trust in His good,pleasant and most perfect will…..
What is your story?